Yeezy For President and the Death of the Handshake: A Short Summary of 2020 So Far
It is now officially August. That means we are well into the second half of 2020 – a year that has, by no means, gone to plan. As the world tentatively reopens its doors, it is the perfect time to reflect on the year so far and ruminate on what the rest of 2020 holds in store for us humans. I imagine a second half of this circus in which the cottage core kids are back in school, and the Brits can finally make it to Ibiza. Savage Love plays on repeat as Kim Kardashian-West roams the White House and rush hour returns to its usual horrors. With the threat of a second wave constantly hanging over our heads, how normal will the infamous new normal really be?
It feels as though a lifetime has passed since January 2020, but the start of the year should have been an indication of how the following few months might play out. Bushfires raged war in rural Australia, a sure-fire sign that a storm was brewing on planet Earth. The WHO was notified of a novel coronavirus outbreak in Wuhan, China, but nobody took much notice in the western world. We were far too preoccupied with Meghan and Harry stepping down from royal duties, the promise of Trump’s impeachment, and the tragic death of NBA star, Kobe Bryant. January 31 2020, the formal Brexit date, came and went with a half-hearted light show in Central London and a brief Au Revoir to mainland Europe. Within a few weeks, we saw the acquittal of the US president and the long-awaited charges against sex offender Harvey Weinstein. Slowly, a new disease was making its way across the globe, but its true peril was yet to be unleashed.
March was truly the turning point of this year. By that I mean it went from bad to worse in the space of about a week. Hand sanitiser and toilet paper sold out practically everywhere and the death of Carol Baskin’s husband remained a mystery. Italy became the first country to implement a nationwide lockdown as WHO declared COVID-19 a global pandemic. Countries around the world quickly followed suit. Life entered a Groundhog Day phase of repetition and April passed in a time warp of Zoom quizzes, home workouts and sourdough starters. Despite an ongoing war against the seemingly unstoppable pandemic, everyday life took on an apocalyptic stillness. But then came May, with an eruption of civil rights protests following the murder of George Floyd at the hands of Minneapolis police officer, Derek Chauvin. Millions of people took to the streets across the world to protest systemic racism and anti-Black violence. Meanwhile, in Hong Kong, protestors demonstrated against China’s threats to impose a new national security law. In North Korea, Kim Jong-Un went missing more times than I left my house, causing speculation over his death and my sanity. McDonald’s grand reopening caused unrivalled traffic queues and Elon Musk celebrated the birth of his unpronounceable child with the launch of his SpaceX rocket.
June hit like a slap in the face. Just as seeing your friends was legalised once again, laws protecting transgender health rights were overturned. The class of 2020 celebrated the end of their degrees with a disappointing online graduation and whatever prosecco mum had left. Though Instagram reverted to memes and fitspo, Black Lives Matter protests continued through Juneteenth celebrations. July followed with a new sense of normalcy: returning to work, the pub, the hairdressers, sparking conversations about issues unrelated to death tolls and mandatory masks. Ghislaine Maxwell began to face consequences for her involvement in Jeffrey Epstein’s sex trafficking scandal and Wiley met the ramifications of a series of anti-Semitic tweets just as a fresh wave of Jewish activism hit social media. We mourned the postponement of the Tokyo Olympics amidst the plans for weddings, birthdays and gap years that 2020 chewed up and spat back out. And then just as coronavirus seemed to be under control and we could all resume our big summer blowout, 2020 dropped its biggest bombshell so far.
A simple tweet that captivated America: “We must now realise the promise of America by trusting God, unifying our vision and building our future. I am running for president of the United States!” Could it be true? Is Kanye West really running for the presidency? It remains unclear whether his potential candidacy is serious or another Yeezus publicity stunt before his upcoming album drop. It seems that the ‘Jesus Is King’ singer/rapper is uncertain himself. Apart from one rally in South Carolina where he proclaimed his Christian, anti-abortionist stance, Yeezy has done little to secure his place in the White House come November. Already, he has missed the deadline to appear on the ballot in several states – South Carolina included. Besides, it appears that Kanye would have little chance against the top two candidates: an obnoxious old man that tells his country to drink bleach, and an even older man who sometimes fluffs his speeches.
As uncertain as Yeezy’s presidency is the remainder of 2020. What further treasures could 2020 have in store for us? An international second wave? A no-deal Brexit? More 5G conspiracies? Most of us remember 2012, the year that the world was destined to end. But conspiracy theorists are jumping on Stephen Hawking’s bandwagon, stating that the Mayan calendar miscalculated by eight years. And according to that logic, it could all be over by 31st December. The entire human race could end up in the same graveyard as Zoom calls and handshakes and the great hand sanitiser drought. Do I believe it? Not exactly. But if 2020 thus far has taught me anything, it is not to bother predicting the future. I am simply grateful to have survived the rollercoaster up until this point. As the old Kanye once said: “Now that that don’t kill me, can only make me stronger.” But I, for one, cannot wait for 2021.
Thumbnail illustration by Zsofi Mayer.
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