From anxiety to empowerment: Interview with Sydney Porter on empowered birthing

Empowered birth. If this is an unfamiliar term to you, chances are that you associate it with spiritual practices. Maybe you imagine swapping pain medication for a bed surrounded by crystals or simply lots of herbal tea and mum yoga. While this can be a part of an empowered birth, it is far from its core definition. Instead, this method is all about reclaiming the power of birth itself and the time leading up to it – and that can look vastly different from person to person. In essence, it means “taking your birthing experience into your own hands, while surrendering to the process,” Sydney Porter explains. She is a 20-year-old model and influencer, as well as the mother of three-month-old Veya. Sydney is a firm believer that anyone who gives birth deserves to experience this kind of empowerment, and she is therefore utilising social media to share her own journey of becoming a mother. We had a chat with Sydney about dealing with anxiety and fluctuating hormone levels during pregnancy, what an empowered birth looks like and the book that changed her life…

Quickfire

DESPITE THE PANDEMIC, HOW HAS 2020 BEEN TREATING YOU SO FAR?

“It’s definitely been a year full of growth and transformation for me. One of my best years of life thus far.”

ONE PREGNANCY ESSENTIAL YOU SWEAR BY?

“Yoga and an extensive and thorough collection of vitamins! Sorry I couldn’t decide between the two!”

DEBUNK ONE COMMON PREGNANCY MYTH.

“When most people think of the early symptoms of pregnancy or what is to be expected during the first trimester, the image of a woman with her head in a toilet bowl throwing up 24/7 usually is what comes to mind. Many people think that morning sickness happens 1.) only in the morning and 2.) always involves vomiting. Well, I can say from experience that ‘morning’ sickness hits at all times of day, and I only actually threw up once during my entire pregnancy!”

SOMETHING YOU HAD TO LEARN THE HARD WAY DURING YOUR PREGNANCY?

“Just how hard the third trimester is! My pregnancy was fairly easy until I got into those last few months, I had so many aches and pains in my hips from all the pressure from the baby weight and sleeping comfortably was nearly impossible.”

WHAT DOES ‘EMPOWERMENT’ MEAN TO YOU?

“Strength, confidence, and raw beauty in every form.”

What does an empowered birth look like?

Traditionally birth has been viewed as a sacred rite of passage, and in many cultures, giving birth and the journey of motherhood is considered an honour. Sydney points out that empowered birthing is not a new concept, it has only been given a new label. Pursuing an empowered birth is about defying the feelings of anxiety and pressure that a lot of new mothers are faced with, and creating a positive birthing experience that is on the terms of both the mother and the child. “Childbirth is so much more profound and earth-shattering than many people realise. It sets the tone not only for the infant’s new life but also for the woman’s transition into motherhood. The process of childbirth is not one to be taken lightly, it’s so imperative to plan and strive for the best birth that can be imagined.”

It is impossible to pinpoint one single ideal birth that everyone should aim for because what an ideal birth looks like is a different story to each and every one of us. This is due to the fact that empowerment is subjective. “I believe anyone can have an empowering birthing experience. I don’t feel that it’s limited only to women who choose natural births or ‘alternative’ methods of childbirth,” Sydney says. On the question of whether or not hospital births can be empowered, she explains that the primal aspect of a woman in labour doesn’t respond as positively to being in an unfamiliar setting. This is the reason why it oftentimes may be more difficult for women to have an ideal birthing experience in a hospital. “This is especially the case in scenarios where the mother and the doctor do not see eye to eye and are not on the same page about the birth at hand.” This was the case for Sydney. She has always been uncomfortable in hospitals and was not pleased with the OBGYN she had at the beginning of her pregnancy. “There are way too many cases of there being a misunderstanding on the doctors part, or simply a medically centred approach rather than a family centre approach to childbirth that results in unnecessary medical interventions.” Nonetheless, home birth is not a determining factor for whether or not the birth itself is empowered. It is up to each individual to decide what feels right for them.

An essential part of the journey to an empowered birth, however, is becoming comfortable with and trusting your instincts. Sydney uses hormones during pregnancy as an example. When she was experiencing the ups and downs of fluctuating hormone levels, what helped was listening to her body and doing what felt good for her in the moment: “I would say when it comes to hormones the best thing to do is just allow yourself to accept the unexpected feelings that may come up, and rest as much as you need to when any nausea, aches, discomfort, and pain hits.”

An empowered birth may look different depending on the person, but the path there is of similar character. “You can plan every single detail of your birth, but things may arise that are entirely out of our control as our babies and our bodies may have something entirely different in mind.” This is why it is important to take the initiative to educate yourself, advocate for yourself and your baby, and preparing mentally, spiritually, and physically for what lays ahead.

SYdney’s experience

While Sydney is an avid advocate for an empowered birthing experience, this was not always a topic she was comfortable with. In fact, when she first found out that she was pregnant, she experienced a lot of anxiety. She would later find out that the root of this issue was that her knowledge about birth was limited to what she had heard from other people and seen in the media. “In my mind childbirth was this horribly excruciating thing to fear, and I really viewed it as one of the most awful things a woman could go through,” Sydney explains. Despite this overwhelming angst, she was conscious that something about her own view had to be wrong.

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I had just made a decision that was going to change my whole outlook on life forever.

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Sydney became determined to get rid of this fear of birth before the baby would arrive but was unsure about where to start the journey. Googling birth seemed like it could do more harm than good: “When you look up things about birth some very traumatic and scary things can surface. Which really just goes to show how necessary it is that the narrative around childbirth in western culture be rewritten.” She decided to opt for a bookstore in the search for positive and unbiased resources on natural childbirth. While the selection on was sparse, one book, in particular, stood out: Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth. “I had no idea at that moment that I had just made a decision that was going to change my whole outlook on life forever. I picked up the book and the rest is history.” In contrast to the narratives surrounding childbirth that Sydney had encountered so far, this book was focused on positive birthing stories as well as “unbiased and factual information about childbirth.” Needless to say, this was Sydney’s first introduction to the concept of empowered birthing.

The training and preparation she would go on to put herself through was something she had great faith in, but as she was approaching the end of her pregnancy, she still found doubt lingering due to the uncertainty of what laid ahead. “I was standing on the edge of this great unknown, something entirely new to me.” She says that she could feel that Veya was ready for the birth long before she was, but when Sydney reached a week and three days overdue she finally felt ready too. “If she wasn’t born in two days’ time, I would have to naturally induce labour, which I absolutely did not want to do.” In an attempt to release her feelings, she sat down and wrote everything she was feeling, including doubts and fears. She also went outside and laid down to be more in tune with nature. These efforts left her feeling “calm, confident, and ready” when she went into labour the same night.

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Not only was my daughter born that day, but I birthed a new version of myself as well.

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Much thanks to the hard work Sydney put into uprooting her initial fear of birth, she ended up with a birthing experience she describes as perfect. “It was very gentle, calm, powerful, and entirely life-changing for me. Not only was my daughter born that day, but I birthed a new version of myself as well.” The only regret Sydney has is not capturing the birth in its entirety on video. In the future, she would also like to give birth in nature. She says that she feels a deep and loving connection to the earth: “I’m forever in awe of her beauty, and spend as much time with her creation as much as I can.”

These days, Sydney is enjoying the early stages of motherhood: “My days are really quite simple most of the time. I wake up when the baby wakes up and usually dedicate my first few waking hours to being very present with her. She’s always so sweet and lively first thing in the rising.” After enjoying breakfast with the family, she checks her emails and social media to plan the workload ahead and sees where her plans align with those of her husband Khepera. “For the most part, my days are very sporadic and have very little routine outside of eating and sleeping.” Looking ahead, she would like to open a retreat centre with her husband to help others who are in the pursuit of a more empowered lifestyle. But the main goal remains the same as always: “For myself and my family to live free in harmony with the earth, just being as we are.”