Finding yourself while getting lost

We all crave to feel safe, whether we are workaholics, artists, students or simply human. - Safe in regards of money, work, friends, our future and current relationships. The sense of stability and certainty is something we desire in some way or another, and in some cases this feeling might actually set us free. For instance, if you have a stable income, you can be sure that after going on a vacation and exploring the world, you’ll still able to live a good life when you get home. If your relationship feels safe and stable, whether that is romantic or platonic, you may feel more confident in being yourself 100%. However, there needs to be some balance between safety and spontaneity. For example, we easily start to feel a bit claustrophobic and starved when stability is simply put in front of us. Over time, the sense of certainty may stop serving us. One day you might wake up and find that this feeling of safe becomes a form of confinement. 

At the age of 18, we have already experienced that freedom and stability does not always go hand in hand. As students, keeping a strict routine is essential to get everything that needs to get done on time. Spending most of our days with our nose in a book or our eyes staring at a blue screen, we are put under so much stress; trying to get good grades, having a social life, finding a degree and a uni, being kind, staying close to family and so on. There doesn't seem to be much time left to find ourselves. 

That is why we wanted to share some aspects of our life that we believe it is worth focusing on when we have a few extra minutes or a whole weekend to ourselves. 

Delve into it.

In a world where we are constantly taught to multitasking and hassle, we hardly every manage to focus at just one thing at a time. You might be creating a mental list of tomorrow’s chores while having brunch with a friend or scrolling through your social media feed while watching Netflix. Because of this urge to be efficient, it can also be freeing to let yourself be fully consumed by something for a while, not focusing on anything else. Pursue your passion and create something you are passionate about. Delve into a book on astrology, get working on the painting you’ve had in the back of your mind, learn how to develop film at home or get started on the novel you always knew you could write.

See it. feel it.

People tend to say that the world has become smaller, and while that is true in many cases, that does not mean that you should stop exploring. Take the train to a beach you’ve never been to or a city you haven’t explored yet. There is so much beauty out there waiting for you, and new perspectives to be formed. You can even do something as simple as exploring your grandparents house, discovering hidden treasures that they forgot a lifetime ago. Time-travel a bit and get lost among old trinkets that gives you that fuzzy yet melancholic feeling, follow the coastline as far as possible and discover new traditions in a foreign city. Embrace your surroundings warmly and maybe you’ll discover some deeper truth about yourself along the way. 

Change it.

Changing up your style every now and then can feel so liberating. Big parts of our every-day life is controlled by a set of habits. Therefore, creating a part of it that is different, can be inspiring. Change your hairstyle, rearrange your furniture or try a new dish.

Trying something new broadens your horizons and you might find something new you truly enjoy doing. It can be something small, like trying to meditate for a few minutes before bed or you can do something more major like try to find a new job that brings you more happiness and freedom. 

Drop it.

Disconnecting is easier said than done. And while you can’t exactly turn off your stressed out mind, at least you can try to find times where you shut out other sources of stress. Practice makes the master. Turn off your phone and laptop. Listen to vinyl, go swimming in a lake, write, watch a film, go outside and take some photos or even just lay in the grass for a while. Simply getting lost, disconnecting yourself from obligations and from any connections to the outside world, might just be the thing that makes you feel more at peace, and ready to continue working. This is a great way of relieving stress and recharging. 

Defy it.

Get out of your comfort zone! A while back we took a break from social media for a week, and it was honestly so hard, but also liberating at the same time. Realizing just how much time we spend checking our emails, updates on Instagram and the miles we scroll with our thumbs, puts everyday-life into perspective. Sometimes, being a bit bored is actually good for you. In fact, it can actually boost creativity and help cultivate mindfulness. Avoiding going on social media the moment we wake up or before we go to bed is also something we both try to do (however we rarely succeed). But the fact that we are trying, makes us feel better.

Challenging yourself does not have to be all about you. Try giving your parents or loved ones a hug every day, and maybe help your sister or friend with the homework they are struggling with. We promise, being your most selfless will benefit you more than you could ever imagine. 

Balance it.

With balance comes finding ways to fuel yourself, love others and get the work you “have” to do done. It means not letting your well-being suffer for deadlines or others expectations of you. For us, this is the hardest one to carry out, because it includes all of the ones mentioned above. However, luckily there are many small steps you can take towards a more balanced lifestyle. For instance, turning off all notifications on your phone will definitely contribute to lessen the time you spend on your phone daily. Once you’ve done this, you can turn your time into something more valuable, like talking to your mother, going to a cafe with your friends and doing something you are truly passionate about. By making sure to spend time both challenging yourself and disconnecting, working hard while pursuing your passion, exploring and changing up your style - you are creating a more balanced life. It takes a while to get there, trust us, we are still not there. But remember that it’s important to learn how to see the bigger picture, while pushing yourself to achieve your goals.